Sometimes we do things in life intuitively. Then, a few years ago, climbing into the mountains to the monks was more out of curiosity. But a retreat with a vow of silence teaches a lot. It teaches many to embrace silence. Since childhood, it seemed to me that “silence is golden” was a very accurate expression, so I didn’t have to work hard to adapt to silence. But that was just the beginning. Such an experience teaches you to be present, here and now, to focus on what is important, to remain still and relax in the moment, rather than waiting for it to pass. It teaches you not to go crazy when information from the outside stops coming in. It fosters patience and discipline. I’m glad I found this old text. It is a good reminder. Now, I would write it differently and interpret everything differently, but for the sake of the story, we’ll leave it as it is.
Another retreat showed me for the first time that “very vegetarian cuisine” can be incredibly delicious (long before it became mainstream). I will not repeat the incredible salad with flowers that we were served for lunch, among other things. But at the end, I will share a cool waffle recipe. Not sweet, made with zucchini. An excellent, non-banal, and quick breakfast.
I got into the retreat by accident. Of course, I had heard the word before, as I had been practicing yoga for several years. No, I had never meditated before. The factors of total isolation — handing over the phone, not taking a laptop, the presence of mountains, the company of Buddhist monks, silence (a vow of silence), and recommendations from a few friends — were intriguing. From a culinary perspective: incredibly tasty (and emphasized) vegetarian food. “After all, there’s yoga every day, that’s what I know, that’s what I can do!” I signed up and left.
“AFTER ALL, THERE'S YOGA EVERY DAY, THAT'S WHAT I KNOW, THAT'S WHAT I CAN DO!”. I SIGNED UP AND LEFT.
The first few hours of the retreat are reserved for getting to know the other participants (which means you can still talk). During this time, you need to hand over your belongings, choose a bed in the dormitory, and collect a bag containing a mosquito net, a blanket, and a bottle for drinking water.
The first step is an interview with a monk to discuss the purpose of your visit. During our conversation, my interests and skills became apparent. “We seem to have a yoga instructor,” noted Monk Tan Hubert. By the evening, I was introduced as part of the staff. That’s how I began teaching yoga from 5:45 to 7:00 for our English-speaking group. The sequence of sun salutations coincided perfectly with dawn, making our practice even more symbolic.
WEEKDAYS
The gong woke everyone up at 4:30 in the morning. The male and female dormitories were located at opposite ends of the grounds and, somewhat unfairly, were a considerable distance from the meditation hall. On the first morning, everyone brushed their teeth in complete darkness, diligently following the advice to “avoid even eye contact to tune in properly.” One participant from Japan even kept her eyes tightly shut. Everyone was still processing the details of the evening’s introductory course: a schedule of 15 meditations per day, including sitting, walking (both alone and in groups), chanting mantras, and a separate meditation on loving-kindness. Meals were served twice a day. Although the “evening tea” included whole wheat bread, homemade butter, and jam, for some reason, it wasn’t considered “eating.”
On the second day, with no news from the outside world, you diligently chew through lingering thoughts from past days and focus on what is presented in the lectures: the teachings of Dharma, comfortable postures for meditation, and initial observations from practice. Some people can’t handle the silence and leave the retreat — not everyone can endure a single day of silence, let alone three more ahead. Many participants find new companions — plants, insects, and birds. It turns out spiders walk in peculiar trajectories, with amusingly serious "expressions" on their faces. And they seem to be afraid of the color yellow (I tested this on five individuals).
Before the retreat began, we were briefed about the wild animals, insects, and snakes we might encounter on the grounds (being in the mountains and jungle) and how to handle them. There was even a story about an employee who was stung by a scorpion after unknowingly sitting on it in the meditation hall. Ever since hearing that, I’ve always checked the cushions carefully. Just in case.
MEDITATIONS
During walking meditations, everyone was treated to the territory of the complex. From the side we looked, probably, like a house for the elderly. Slow walking on paths and in the shade of trees. And in the group we were clearly like zombies - the same movements, step by step. At night around the illuminated Buddha statue.
THE BRAIN IS ACTIVE AND WORKING, BUT THERE ARE NO THOUGHTS. A RESONANT, ACTIVE EMPTINESS.
It is not necessary to talk about meditation itself - it is difficult to describe. Perhaps, I will only say the important thing - this is not a state of falling asleep. The brain is active and working, but there are no thoughts. A resonant, active emptiness.
ADAPTATION
Sleeping on a wooden bed with a small wooden pillow the size of a brick turned out to be more restful than in soft beds. On the third day, I discovered a plant that folds its leaves when touched. I "spoke" to it five times a day. Because of my yoga teaching duties, I was excused from other tasks like cleaning the grounds, bedrooms, and kitchen. This left me with even more time to walk and explore. The most beautiful sunset view was from the kitchen. Below the mountain lay the Hua Thanon district, the only Muslim village community on the island. From 6 to 7 p.m., the muezzin's call to prayer resonated beautifully and piercingly, summoning the villagers to the mosque. I stood there, looking out at the sea, while the sun set behind the mountains during this live performance.
The last, fourth dawn was the most moving—and the most beautiful. By then, even 15 meditations a day felt like too little. Before breakfast, the vow of silence was lifted. I returned home with a quiet sense of peace, as if I had gained knowledge far greater and more significant than I had four days earlier. Surely, I had.
This is one of the few free retreats in Southeast Asia. During participation, you are required to strictly follow the rules and remain within the meditation center's grounds.
Zucchini morning waffles
In season, zucchini and summer squash are more affordable than many other vegetables. They are ideal for anyone who cares about healthy eating — low in calories and a perfect match with other ingredients. There are dozens of ideas and recipes to make you fall in love with zucchini like never before. But these breakfast waffles are among the favorites. The bonus? They’re not only low in calories but also high in protein and gluten-free.
